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Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Tue Jun 28, 2011 1:05 pm
by RSfan
@ nms - There is a lot of good information on this web site, and I hope you do some reading. It has helped me a lot. I agree with you 100% about Match.com being highly disappointing when it comes to option for "reporting" a scammer. And I also had a couple of very suspicious "friend requests" on F.B. Fortunately, my privacy settings on F.B. are maximum, so they were not able to hack in there. I am new here myself, so I am still feeling fairly bruised, too. There is a great thread for reading on this site in the Forum under "Victim Support" (or something close to that) called "You are not Stupid". It is well worth the read.....you have come to the right place for support and advice. I am sorry for your experience, but you are not alone.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 2:46 am
by wwR
..Because I consider myself very wise to the way the game is played, I did not tell anyone - And because the "relationship" was so serious and real to me (in which money was involved), once I realized what was happening/ had happened, I simply returned to work telling my peers that I got cold feet. The day before my mom and dad were suppose to fly in for the ceremony, I told them the same. When the coordinator at the Sheraton called to confirm the ballroom rental, I shared with her something else..and, lastly, when I returned my dress to Dillard's- of course, I told them a different story - just too embarassing ~ Agh! ..life..you live and you learn..and then realize you're never as smart as you think you are ~

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2011 8:33 pm
by corneliabeth
Hi friends,

I have never fallen for a scammer, probably because I am not one to "fall" for anyone.

I recently (three weeks) joined OK Cupid. Since joining, I have received letters for three scammers.

My profile is hidden, but they seem to have a way to find it.

I have been fortunate to have met a few nice men in my area. I've had a few nice dates and things with one-of the men, seem to be progressing at a normal, natural pace.

Why would I want to meet men who live in Spain or the UK when I live in USA?

There was, actually, one who claimed to live in my state. I know the town a bit (where he claimed to live)and he said that he was a jeweler- self employed, of course. Yet, there was no listing of anyone of his name in the town- neither as a resident or a jeweler.

Another fellow (Matt Heywood, who has already been reported) claims to have a PhD. in geophysics. He says that he live in Leicester, Eng, yet his English is atrocious. To earn a PhD, one must, usually, have a published work. I google searched him and the FIRST hit was this site, where I immediately found him. He has written to me today.

Another fellow, Oscar Pedrosa, fell in love with me just be looking at my profile, haha. He says that, ""God sent you to me." He claims to be a banker in Madrid, but, of course, there is no listing for a man of this name as a banker in Madrid.

Remember, the www means WORLDWIDE web: this means that if someone says that he is an MD in Holland, a search of him on any good search engine would bring this info up, if it was true.

Use the info you have! Do internet searches and if he does not appear in the city from where he tells you then he is not real.

If he/she is a gorgeous model in a foreign country, why would he/she be looking on the internet for a partner on the other side of the world?

My UN-solicitated advice- keep your profile private and only communicate with persons you pick. Limit your search to your locality. If a person claims to live in a nearby town, Google search him/her. If an MD, engineer, jeweler, PhD in your areas does not have any info on the web, chances are that he/she is not a real person.

I have no desire to move across the wold to meet someone or have him come move his life to my home. I also do not want a partner who does not speak my language.

Be smart. No one falls in love in a few days. If you're THAT perfect that potential partners from all-over-the world find you irresistible, you are fine enough to appeal to a person close to your own home.

The funny thing: rather than asking me if my pics are recent (which they are) the potential scammer told me that I look so "young for your stated age."

Should I see a 50 yr old man with a pic that displays him as far-younger than his stated age, the proper thing to do is to ask if the pics are recent- not to assume that he looks ten -yr younger, but that he has posted old pics. This is more-likely the case.

TRUST YOUR GUT!! If it seems too good to be true: it probably is..

Love,

cb

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2011 8:56 pm
by FrumpyBB
Yes, from a cool rational point of view you are pretty correct with all that you said.

Just bear in mind that many internet users are happy when there appears someone who is interested in their persons, who can listen and who opens a great future for the two to come.

This is the mindset the better scammers help to put their victims into, plus they HELP to isolate them from their family.

Money requests then do not appear to be totally out off the sky because they fit a 1000 times well tested believing and convincing storyline.

Therefore, I have a lot of understanding for anyone who has simply learnt about scams too late.

I have never fallen for a scammer, probably because I am not one to "fall" for anyone.
With education about scams, you have a far better likelihood but there is no 100% formula. Scammers try many different angles and who might not go for a love scam might go for an ebay scam or job scam or lotto scam. See "Other Types of African Scams" section with multiple examples. Their IPs show it´s the same clientele that does these love scams and believe us they get to know their "jobs" well. Someone who has paid in a love scam but now appears to wise up to that will then be specifically targeted with, say, a charity scam, asking for a quick WU donation for the Somalia people. The recipient of which is a lousy Lagos internet cafe boy who wants some new phones, and NOT the UN headquarters who had emailed you with a yahoo email address.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Sep 16, 2011 4:37 pm
by Gabriella
Hello,i must say i told my family and after this i did it i lost my family complet,there only 3 persons i am still talking to and i lost my Husband ,but we are still friends,i lost my home and my friends around ,i was so bad in love ,i was foolish and i lost same Money,but not much i did send him a IPad 2 and an IPhone 4,now i know why and for what he do need this,but after searchen alot around i found this side her,i find out ,that this Man on the oicture could not be him.so it was very bad for me after this time .i guess it will take a long time to get better ,but romance scam.did help me alot and i must say its feel alot better to have somebody to talk to.And when i can help i will search for others to i have time now ,many time .i do not wont that other persons go true this what i did ,and there are alot loosing more then i did.Thank you for being there for us,

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2011 12:09 am
by florbela
I did not send money but I felt scammed since for three months I believed in a lier.

I just confirmed my suspicious yesterday when, after a "car accident", the kind doctor in Abuja - Nigeria - sent me the bill. I'm ashamed of the situation, to had trust him, but I'm telling everyone I can about that, even writing in my blog, without show photos or names, especially because I never read anyone in Brazil - where I am from - about romantic scams.

These criminals must be known in everyone so people can be always aware.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Thu Sep 22, 2011 9:19 pm
by SlapHappy
Thank you for being brave enough to tell your story here, and on your blog in Brazil, florbela. I'm glad that you did not lose money to your scammer, but I feel for your loss of trust in other people. There is no need to be ashamed, although it is natural to feel that way. Scammers are professional thieves, and do this for a living. Some are very good at it. Do not let him take away your goodness and trust. Just be careful. You are aware now, and education of the public is the biggest weapon against these criminals. Thanks for posting.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Sep 23, 2011 1:11 am
by florbela
Thank you, SlapHappy,

It's hard to not feel ashamed. I took a quite long time to tell people I had met someone I thought it was special and now I had to say that everything was a huge lie, that he is a thief.

Read you all here is helping me so much! It's good to see I'm not alone and I was luckier than many others.

I don't want to become a bitter person and I have so many good things in my life to let someone so evil change me to something bad!

And, for sure, education is the best weapon! Since it's not possible to have at this time a world without scammers, I wish everybody knew about them!

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Sep 23, 2011 7:52 pm
by duckhunter
I don't want to become a bitter person and I have so many good things in my life to let someone so evil change me to something bad!
Florbella, that is the most valuable thing you have ever/will ever possess. And it's the only thing you have complete control over unless you give it away to the criminals. So glad you chose to keep it.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Dec 09, 2011 2:46 pm
by Lioness1
As we've been talking so much lately about getting the word out, I'm interested in how many people those that were scammed confided in about it.
Since yesterday I am a member of your community. I am still in contact with this person, supposedly an oil engineer, he tried all tricks to ask for money (sending to his agent by Western Union, I found out a nigerian, over a bank account under another name, cause no own account in the UK, only in the USA, now he wants me to transfer it under his name with Western Union again). I had been warned by a good girl-friend, God thanks. Except of a higher phone/internet bill and annyance of a very "good" friend, nothing happend. To this friend over 5 years I spoke in a letter about this scam, but I think, he will not understand. I`ve never heard of romance scam until october 2011, but I´m not unrealistic! I am a trained banker.

Two weeks ago I handed my complaint to the Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3). Now, I want to set everything to you (not realy knowing how, I try to get it). I think, I was a good collector. I speak German and French and understand your language. I promise, I carry everything out, and I want you and me to stop these people.

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Dec 09, 2011 3:26 pm
by FrumpyBB
Break up all contact you have with this person and feel free to post all his scam details in a new thread in White Males section :)

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Dec 09, 2011 7:14 pm
by Lioness1
Break up all contact you have with this person and feel free to post all his scam details in a new thread in White Males section :)
Well, thank you so much for your answer, tomorrow I`ll set everything on to your side. Since my partner died, Jnauary 1st, 2006, I stayed alone, was a worker during the whole week, so, the reason of all was only, there is somebody who has time for you and listening! My best friend just called me, didn`t understand at all, will come next weekend, so all will be fine again. He is a real engineer, "young sal", says everything, I`ll explain him the situation.

You can be very sure, I am a stabile person, I`m good in negotiation of contracts and so on (I am working for a real estate company) and it happened to me , too! At first, I thought I was going grazy. No, for anyone in the world!

I have so many contacts, and it helps a lot to speak about what makes you troubled! For sure!

Wish you a nice evening - till tomorrow! Thank you again!

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:01 pm
by Lioness1
Yesterday I made two experiences: one good and one less good. At noon, in the pedestrian zone with the Christmas market and with hot wine, I was talking with two friends and a foreign couple joined us. We "landed" on the subject of romance scam. The man, late 40s, got the compliment by me, he would also be a good victim object! (an expert eye) His wife thanked me. In conclusion by me, after 45 entertaining minutes, he said: "..with my charisma and personality, I would not need an Internet chat with someone unreal!" "For Christmas, he would like me to have the courage to speak and find the right person!"

The negative experience: in the early evening, a good friend of mine gave me "washed" the head, because of the Internet incident. He neither liked my complaint with IC3 or membership with this community, he meant: "Stupidity should be punished even more!" When he was gone, I almost would have come to tears, but also the key insight, I was naive, and you are the best thing could have happened to me after that. Later I occupied myself with reading of your threads in the forum, to learn including improving English skills.

Try to make the best of it all. I`m moving through by this!

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2011 1:40 pm
by FrumpyBB
Try to take the latter not too seriously. It´s a typical outsider´s comment whenever this subject comes up in newspapers or media, it just shows they cannot understand how it works and how convincing it is because they´ve never dealt with it. They are lucky. On the other hand, never having dealt with it means being totally unprepared for scams. I believe this is also part of the big education project. Try to take it not too personally, my mother would say/has said the same because she´s never been in such a situation. And somehow it´s human to think at ifirst reflex "This would never happen to ME."

Re: If you were scammed, how many people did you tell?

Posted: Fri Jan 13, 2012 7:19 am
by Smooth
If i was scammed I would break up all the contacts with man. That would be a good experience for me. they say we learn from our mistakes. But anyway I won't tell it anyone, if only my family (mom).