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Romance Scam

Please report romance scams and dating scams here. We accept reports on Russian scammers and Nigerian scammers.

Disclaimer regarding pictures posted on the board: please understand that you are NOT looking at the pictures of people who are actually scamming you. The people portrayed on these photos are innocent men and women, NOT involved in scamming in any way and have nothing to do with scammers. The scammers are using their images without their knowledge or permission to deceive their victims and steal their money.




No one here is stupid!

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Pinky
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No one here is stupid!

Postby Pinky » Mon Aug 17, 2009 5:05 pm

Like I said in a recent post to another person here, you are articulate and can express yourself well. You knew enough about computers and email and the internet to enter into a relationship and derive some enjoyment out of it. You finally recognized the scam though and found us. You navigated yourself here and posted. You obviously have intellect. To keep insinuating you’re stupid or a laughing stock is actually insulting to those here who’ve probably lost as much or more than you have.

Wayne, can we have a stupid sticky? And how about a stupid icon like the F bomb icon? It is discouraging that so many people think of themselves as stupid when they’re only good, decent, caring, compassionate, loving people. Do we call rape victims stupid? Do we call a plane crash survivor stupid? NO!

We’ve got to stop with the stupid.
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No one here is stupid!

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rats
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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby rats » Sun Dec 20, 2009 6:50 am

I agree....I think the common link between all of us who are here is that we open minded and we care about people...It might make us intially more vunerable but not stupid...I am beginning to see that this is a fulltime job for these scumbags...they study us and clue in to our weaknesses...they are the preditors and we are their prey...they are evil!!!!...all we can do is learn from our mistakes and move on...doing our best not to become bitter and angry..but to directing our energy towards taking them out one by one in order to prevent another unsuspecting victim to suffer like we have....thanks to everyone who shares their experiences on this site..words cannot express how helpful it has been to me!!!

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby On A Mission » Sun Dec 20, 2009 1:18 pm

It is not the money that is evil but the greed that some have for it that makes the evil. I do believe that there is nothing that these low life people will not attempt to do for the dollar, even stooping as low as robbing their own mother on her death bed. They are getting, I guess we could say on the job training all the time to be the best at what they do and without knowledge of such underhanded tactics is why so many fall prey to them. They use our weak points to bring out all of the good emotions that we do have knowing we will do what we can to help them. We may feel stupid but being deceived by someone like this does not make you a stupid person at all. I am not a negative person but I do not believe that we can ever stop them but we can do our best to educate others about this growing problem.
I read the posts here daily to try and stay updated and learn all I can. I know that I have been able to help some not fall prey to these, as you put it scumbags, and could not of helped without all the people that do post and run RS. Thanks to all :hugz:
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>>REAL FACES OF SCAMMERS<<[/b]

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Pinky » Sun Dec 20, 2009 3:00 pm

Dear sisters (and brothers who lurk here ;) ), just because I've never been scammed by an African, doesn't mean I don't have a good understanding for how you feel and why you are here. I used to wonder myself why I became so enrolled in this cause. My family thinks I must hate men. Some men think I have some sort of vendetta. I guess I can't say my ex husband didn't contribute because my ultimate scam was being married for 22 years to someone who wasn't really who he pretended to be - but I also can't say I am not appreciative to him for what he taught me. I learned how to be happy. Now what works for me, might not work for everybody, but I will share with you my knowledge and perhaps you can find something that will benefit you too.

First off, I know depression. It can be overcome. I sought medical AND spiritual help. My doctor never negated my bishop's counsel and vice versa. My doctor prescribed an anti depressant and we tried 3 differernt brands to find the one my body responded to. He also told me the importance of sleep. When you are depressed, it's your body's own natural defense mechanism to try and heal and balance brain chemistry. He gave me permission to sleep as much as I wanted while the meds kicked in - but at that point, I wasn't sleeping enough.

Then he told me about the quality of sleep. He said that the brain needs total darkness to produce serotonin and even bright numbers on an alarm clock can disrupt this important process. Caffeine is another inhibitor as well as other toxins we ingest thinking they can make us feel better. Alcohol and tobacco are two of many lies we tell ourselves we need to calm us. They don't. They make depression worse, I cut these things from my life and began to sleep a regular 8 hours a night.

My bishop taught me the power of prayer. I learned to get on my knees for at least 15 minutes each day and ask God for help. I also learned to be patient and wait for the answers. It was amazing to me to start to see a pattern. Aside from the peace and comfort I felt while praying, I noticed that people and things just suddenly started coming into my life at the right places and times when I needed them most. I learned to recognize those answers. This reminds me of something that happened to me many years ago right at this time of year, that I think was an answer to my prayers.

At a really low point in my life just after my divorce, someone who still remains anonymous to me, chose me to celebrate the 12 days before Christmas by leaving small tokens and gifts on my doorstep each night. They were nothing really elaborate or expensive but life saving to me to see how God uses others to answer our prayers. It was proof to me that someone cared and that God cared.

This brings me to the purpose and reason why I'm on this site. You know how some people exercise a lot for the endorphin rush? I'm a happiness junkie. I have discovered that doing things for and serving others is the best way to lose my own troubles and sorrows and convert them to happiness. Those of you who post here, know this is true. It helps us trememdously to know that we are helping others. I know it's a challenge to think of anyone else while you feel so rotten, but believe me, it works. That's a promise.

Last, is a silly thing. Smile. Stand in front of a mirror and practice if you have to, but I have discovered that when I force myself to smile, not only do I start to feel better but everyone around me resoponds to me in a more positive and uplifting manner. The operative word in that sentence is 'responds'. Most people will go out of their way to avoid someone who's not smiling. If you want people in your life, you have to reel them in. A smile is the best bait I know of.

We are survivors!
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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby FrumpyBB » Sun Dec 20, 2009 6:13 pm

I´ve been reading this twice now, it´s very insightful, and I do not know what to reply, or rather, to which extent I manage to reply. Either I do it in 2 sentences or I´ll have to spend the whole evening to write something up, which I will edit over and over tomorrow morning.
Oh well, maybe I start somewhere and then turn away :lol:
Or you go to the National Archive of Private Journals, and see what I was doing in cases of bad moods for about 2 decades :lol: because then, writing stuff up was my personal therapy against "crap on Earth" and "crap I think about people and "crap I think people think about me" :D.
I have discovered that doing things for and serving others is the best way to lose my own troubles and sorrows and convert them to happiness. Those of you who post here, know this is true. It helps us trememdously to know that we are helping others. I know it's a challenge to think of anyone else while you feel so rotten, but believe me, it works. That's a promise.!
^^Yes, this works very fine for me! Definitely true! It is incredible since it´s only emails and PMs and not more direct but this is a great motivator to continue and continue and continue :)

The other one for me is that educating people about scams, a la longue, is more effective than baiting (even if the latter might be more fun at times, fun of the "ringing doorbells and running away"-quality = socially acceptable misbehaviour). It´s a point for us and a point against scammerland, every saved person who will not pay any more..

And about the thread title, I hate it, too, when scam survivors (as Crescentmoon has suggested as a new term for "victims") call themselves "stupid" for having been stolen money from. This puts the blame for a crime away from the criminal to the victim, and is very bad and destructive. I try to contradict everyone here who uses that "s"-word.
Please try your best to block ALL your scammer´s still incoming messages and calls!

What is all this? => The FAQ

The scammers vs. Why is "he" still doing it?

Why is alerting the man in the pictures DANGEROUS?

Please click why confronting my scammer is terribly wrong :)

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Crescentmoon » Mon Dec 21, 2009 3:10 am

Thank you Pinky for your sincere post and thank you Frumpy for not using the "v" word. :applause:

I believe words are powerful and have energy. If you wake up in the morning and say, I am going to have a bad day, chances are you will. There is an old quote (and I know I am going to get it wrong) but it has to do with knowledge being power. After the intial shock of realizing that you have had a thief in your life is over, it is important for all "survivors" of a scam to be empowered. That is what this this site does. It empowers people with knowledge. Now that we have this knowlege, I believe we are all obligated to be messengers.

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby The Wild Geese » Mon Dec 21, 2009 9:18 am

Thank you everybody for all the words of wisdom you are sharing with us here in RS. I know I wasn't and I'm not stupid at all! Some of these scammers are really very good in what they are doing. I think they have been doing this kind of evil profession for some time that is why their tactics are improving to the better at their side while weakening the saneness of their naive victims. Yes, no victim is stupid but when somebody is under the spell of the devil, it seems that all your senses are paralyzed. You are some sort of hypnotized. As if the words of the scammer is your command. No, you don't feel that you are giving him money because you pay him to love you. No! Not that way! Never in my case! Why should we? It's not difficult to find someother else for free if that is what we need. I felt that I was helping somebody out of some misfortunes.

During that time when I was under the spell of the devil, those were the hard days. Being once a scammer's victim, I learned the real value of money. I learned how it feels when you just have enough. I had to experience being a scammer's victim for me to learn how save. Yes, it’s true that I needed a scammer to open my eyes how to appreciate the abundance I have in life. As I said before, I am not rich but I always have more than enough of what I need in a simple way of living. I learned how it feels when you just have enough to survive from pay day to pay day. I know how it feels when you empty your personal emergency accounts. It was really very scary. When I cut off all my contact with my scammer, woke up and I then realized that what I was doing was beyond my imaginations that I could do. I was really under the spell of the devil No other explanation for that.
Nothing wrong of being an Engr. as long as you are real. :-)

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Brooks » Tue Dec 22, 2009 5:00 am

Hi Pinky...my name is Pat and I just joined...For 5 months now I have finally found this site and found out that a connection with a person name David Bliane has been scamming me..he started out with all the romantic stuff for several weeks saying he was a Marketer for his company and went to Nigeria at Port Hartscourt with shipments of goods and is now stuck there cause of the customs agents found some goods that were in his shipment that was illegal that he didn't know about and they were fineing him some large sum of money and he didn't think he'd be stuck there so he didn't take any credit cards with him ( which dah I should of suspected something then) but in dinial that I was in I believed everything he told me..of course he couldn't get any monies to pay the fine and if I would help him out and loan him some money?..well lucky I am smart enough about MY money that I said 'No'..well this whole senario has been going on now for 4 months cause I am still in denial cause he's sending me all these 'love letters' and me believing everything...now he's having problems rounding up $150 for his immagration papers to be renewed...with all this he has a good friend that has been helping him pay some monies for his problems there and he's name is Nnamdi Nwamuo...so I typed it in the computer and found a letter from a member in this site about this guy and now the BELLS and WHISTLES have woke me up...these guys have a scam going..I THANK GOD that I have not given any money to this whole scam...anyway I have so much more I could tell you but the reason I am contacting you is because there has to be a way we can get these guys by laws and is it possible?
I don't want anyone to have to go through the emotional 4 months that I have gone thru..Oh buy the way...I was so STUPID to be calling him and ended up with a $144 phone bill from all the texting and calls just because I thought I loved this person...I want to give you his name...so other women will know it and not fall in there scam...Its DAVID BLIANE..And he will tell his sad story and he lost his wife..anyone can find him on Tagged.com like I did...nice looking with a 9 yr. old son...don't join the site but they can just go to Browse...then up top to Search then type his name in and his so called picture is there...I can't believe a women of my age (65) would fall for this crap now...I would like to help anyone if I can..

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Pinky » Tue Dec 22, 2009 2:22 pm

Welcome Pilikea! Kudos to you for posting him up so others might be warned. It's also a relief that you did not lose money. If you've read around here much you will see that is not the case for many.

There is no chance you can stop him but there are ways to help others avoid him. You've done the first by adding two of the names he's using, here. Google will find them for others who search. Another is to take care not to alert him that you know he's a fraud. Otherwise he'll change his names, accounts and story and all that is posted here will be useless.

Another, which you may have done already, is add more information like his IP address, email account, a copy of his request for moner and very important, the picture he's using.

Last, you are one smart cookie at 65, to not have lost money over four months. Look at all the time you made him waste! It's not stupid to love.
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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Brooks » Tue Dec 22, 2009 3:40 pm

Good Morning Pinky...glad to see your reply this morning when I checked in...got a email this morning from that person David Bliane and of course I deleted it right away...thank heavens I found this site...he wants me to call him again today!...NOT!
Lastnight I was saying the Lord's Prayer and it hit me the words "but led us not into temptation,and deliver us from evil" and ....there it is!!. all in a nut shell...these scammers are the devil and tempting us with there lies...
it will remind me of them now everytime I say this prayer...may you have a Merry Christmas and too all of the women on this site...We Will Unite....!!! its real good that we have this site to help others and get support... :)

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby aimrup » Wed Feb 03, 2010 5:47 pm

I just want to thank the moderators of this site for the time they invest in this. All the information here has been very helpful to me. I think I would have had a very difficult time disentangling myself from the scammer otherwise. I am also so grateful to be able to post all the information I had on scammer to the forum. It aids in the healing to know that I could be helping someone uncover a scam or prevent them from being hurt. I went from feeling foolish and naive to feeling angry and defiant. I will not let these scumbags win.

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Pinky » Thu Feb 04, 2010 6:06 am

I'm so happy we could help you and thrilled you want to help too! You're awesome! :applause:
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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby anniesdogs » Thu Feb 18, 2010 6:06 pm

Hi everyone,
Don't quite know how to start this. Yes i do feel very stupid and yes i have been scammed.
Only realised in the last few days and am left with a wopping credit card debt of 4,500 pounds. I find it difficult to even type. I feel devastated, sick, can't sleep, in shock. How can this have happened, the man that i had got to know over the last few months was so caring, cried when watching sad films, was deeply troubled by the death of the soldiers who were killed or injured alongside him!!! Now i realise that he was really a callous, cruel trickster that knew exactly which buttons to press to get me to send money to him.
He called himself Major David Thorpe. He was 55yrs old on 2nd feb and was retiring from his lifetime army career on boxing day. I was dubious at first and explained that i was a single parent living very simply and that I was probably not right for him so he knew from the off that I had no spare money. He reassurred me and said that he was looking for a 'good woman' to be a soulmate, partner to enjoy life when he retired from the army. He didn't care that I had no money!
He sent poems, prayers, talked of his Jewish mother who had passed away, his father who was in the military all his life and told me that his two daughters lived in Arizona with the ex-wife.
He asked me if i would accept the delivery of a packing case with all his personal belongings so that he had them when he arrived in England...I refused, couln't see the point.
He then apologised profusely and said he would never mention it again as he didn't want to scare me away. We chatted for months then he said he had to go to Accra in Ghana as DHL was going to ship his packing cases and he needed to see there safe return, that is when the problem arose. It was going to cost 24,000 pds and because he was stationed out of the country Barclays would only sanction 20,000 so he asked me to send the 4,000 pds to make up the deficit, he even sent a reciept from DHL with the 4,000 outstanding on it!! He said i'll be back in a week and pay the whole lot off interest also. I fell for it hook, line and sinker. The interest is building by the day. I have spoken to the samaritans as I felt as if I wanted to just go to sleep and never wake up. I have now told my daughters and son and they have been very supportive and feel equally violated.
I just can't believe there are people out there that can be so heartless.
May i say it has helped to know that there are people out there that understand how I feel. I have put the balls in motion to swap the credit card balance to an interest free option and hope to get some overtime shifts to help to pay the amount off but this will take years.
Thank you for being a listening ear.
Ann
I am so stupid, i feel empty, lost. All i could do was to get it on a credit card i used to use for holidays.

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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby Pinky » Thu Feb 18, 2010 7:46 pm

You cannot say you are stupid here. We'll let you get away with naive and too trusting, but that's the extent of it. You are not a stupid woman. Here we ALL know that because you are amongst many just like yourself. There are women here (men too) who have lost far greater than you.

These men who do this are skillful actors, impostors and thieves. You're scammer posed behind a picture of a white guy in the military, which is utterly despicable in itself, but he is nothing more than a Nigerian youth, probably not more than 20 years old, who is a lazy, lying sociopath. Never expect to find any empathy or remorse from him.

If you haven't broken off all contact, please do so immediately. It will only get worse if you let him get back with you. He would take the last penny from a dying child's hand. This is the cold hard truth. The only thing that can make you feel any better at this point is to know you can have a hand in rescuing either another current victim he's scamming along side you, or ruin any of his future opportunities. You can do this by posting his full fake name, email address, pictures he's using, IP address, phone numbers, and any other pertinent information like addresses or other names he's given you. When you post this information on our site, the internet search engines quickly pick up the words and numbers so that anyone else who's suspicious of him might find the information and proof you posted. Please help us help you.

You will get through this. Brace yourself for the support that will pour out from the women here who have walked in your shoes. There are some absolutely brilliant women here who used to call themselves stupid too. Not any more.
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Re: No one here is stupid!

Postby OnceBittentwicescorn » Mon Mar 15, 2010 9:52 pm

I think I am communicating with your David Thorpe. Can you send me a message and let me know which dating site you picked him up on?

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