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Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2011 2:59 pm
by RSfan
@ Vonsinister

After all the things I have read in your posts, I am not interested in you wishing me "Good Luck". You know nothing about what you speak of, and you should stay away from us least stay away from me. Your "good luck" is unwelcomed by me. :evil:

Getting your "education" at my expense, and the expense of other victims....not good.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2011 7:53 pm
by naive22
Oh VonsinIster - thank you for reminding me that its men like you are the exact reason that I will no longer date online.


Most of the women on this site are highly educated and tired of meeting jerks - so a few kind words and some attention and you start to feel hope.

But again, thanks for the reality check.

Deleted full quote of VSĀ“ post. Reading it once was enough ;) F

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Fri Jun 17, 2011 8:07 pm
by duckhunter
Now that VonSinister has been made aware that his comments have stung fresh wounds, I would like to try to steer this conversation back to where it belongs.

Becoming a target of scammers has nothing to do with intelligence. ALL victims and survivors of scam share qualities that others do not possess. It is their innate goodness and willingness to go to great lengths to help a fellow human being. These people are compassionate and caring and loving. I believe if a day comes that everyone on this planet is like those who have been scammed, heaven on earth will have been achieved.

And you who feel stupid now will have been the way-showers. I don't see anything stupid about that at all. The world needs more people like you.

Edit to add: These wonderful qualities are also expressed in the founder, administration and moderators here who haven't been scammed ... which is why this site exists.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2011 12:29 am
by PennyCoyne
Hi everyone

No-one who has been the victim of scambug criminals is stupid; they were being human! People in love prepared to help those that they loved. :love: It is that human trait that makes all those people "Special" not stupid. :kissing:
Please all of you "Humans " out there do not feel you are less of a person because of your compassion, that makes you more of a person. :applause: Don't feel broken, more so be proud of who you are, a person of worth. :applause:
Time is a great healer and in time you will heal, the pain of the heartache :heartbroken: and the emotional turmoil will fade, and you will be a stronger wiser person, but you will still be special, because of your compassion for others.

When you have finished your research mugu we will hunt you, be assured of that. :mad: You think you are cleaver, maybe your arrogance will actually be your downfall.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sat Jun 18, 2011 12:58 am
by PennyCoyne
@ BoomerAngel

Hang in there you are doing great, honest :applause: You are a special person, because you have compassion, you care about people and how they feel :applause: The world could do with more people like you, it would then be a far better place to live. :applause:

I am going to tell you keep your chin up ;) hang in there special person, you know what it is like to be human and to feel :kissing:

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 4:43 pm
by RSfan
@ PennyCoyne, DuckHunter, & Pinky,

You make me smile with your kind and wise words of encouragement. :applause: This smile that I wear today...just a few days later from when I felt "paralyzed", is a smille that is the result of healing that is coming from the support of so many wonderful people on this web site who have embraced me, and other fresh victims, with understanding, sage advice, technical assistance (so necessary to catching the scammer), and your empathy.

I feel like the entire group on this forum has taken me from my shattered pieces not even 2 weeks ago, and you have nursed me back 'together', both as individuals and as a collective support group, slowly back to a point where I now have a lot of hope for returning to normalcy. I do NOT feel stupid anymore!! I have stopped beating myself up. My faith in mankind is beginning to return. Thank you!! I am not 100% yet, but day-by-day, I am feeling more hope and even smiling more often than crying.....this much healing in less than 2 weeks. I have great hope now for total healing :) One thing is certain, I also have a LOT more knowledge which is empowering. I truly think I could spot a scammer a mile away now, and that is huge.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sun Jun 19, 2011 6:08 pm
by The Wild Geese
Hello BoomerAngel :)
Now you sounds you are in your right way of the healing process. Keep following the right side of the road little sister. We are here if you need directions. I took that same road you are taking now. I was lost two years ago but RS guided me to reach the summit. :kissing:

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Fri Jul 20, 2012 1:45 am
by Violator_rose101
I am so glad I found this forum. I only wish I had come here sooner. I will post my story soon, just as soon as I move all of his photos into a location that will allow me to post them here and get a FAKE stamp put on the engineering contract that he emailed to me.

I feel bad about what happened to me, but I am glad I am not alone. It makes me feel better seeing that other people have been in my exact situation. No, no one here is stupid. We all wanted to make new friends and unfortunately there are just some bad people out there.

I believe coming here will help make me feel better because right now I feel very embarrassed and ashamed that I let this man make me think he actually liked me and was going to make some of the wrongs in my life right; and all he wanted to do was to take advantage of me.

This place is awesome!

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Fri Jul 20, 2012 4:23 am
by Pinky
Glad you found us but sorry under the circumstances! Just ask if you need any help.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 8:41 am
by KSTerri
Pfft . . . nobody here is stupid. I know I'm not stupid, but I spent the last 36 hours exchanging texts with one scammer and emails with another. Yes, a two-fer.

And, I'm a lawyer.

Everyone made the leap of faith required for computer dating. Heck, one of my friends met her husband on match and another says three of her friends have. I can name a half-dozen friends who have dated on match casually and seriously. I've been divorced for 3 years and am fine by myself. So, I thought, "what the heck."

That was a week ago. And suddenly you're swarmed with winks and IMs and there's a half dozen men trying to get you onto Yahoo! IM (Luckily I avoided that. I had an identity theft issue with Yahoo! and will never set foot there again). And then a couple of ridiculously attractive men are giving you the electronic equivalent of "can you believe this place, c'mon, let's get out of here," and you follow. You are in no physical danger. You are in your own office or living room. And, hey, it's just talk. What could the harm be?

The emails are a bit garbled, but the message is so compelling. You just think he is a bad typist. Yeah, I had a couple of warning bells go off, but, hey, it's just talk. Right? I even showed a couple of the pics to my best friend and she encouraged me. I have dated some fine looking men in my day and my ex-husband was a show-stopper. So, handsome men being interested in me was not out of line.

Then the texts. Silly romantic texts that make your heart leap whenever your phone blips. Your best friend is teasing you a bit about when you are going to meet this romeo in person. You start to think about it. . . .

Now, for me, this all happened inside 36 hours. All I lost was a Saturday. Something tripped a trigger in my head and I did my google-fu and found this site. I got on the net research hard and confirmed all the little fears I had had. I pushed my texting scammer a bit and we have a "date" for lunch tomorrow in a major city that is halfway between us. I am sure in the morning I will get a notice about something horrid that has happened to him and he can't make it. Whatever.

Now, I lost nothing but a day, a thin layer of pride, a couple of emotional and honest emails, and some innocence. When I go back into the dating pool, it will be with a cynical eye. Now, every man is a scammer until he proves otherwise. Only first names, a separate email account just for correspondence, and a lot more cynicism. That is actually sad, but it is the way of things.

You are only a victim if you feel like one. I don't. Every day you are hurt is a day they win. Don't let the little jerkwads win. Take your power back. And be a lot more careful about relinquishing it again. I will be checking this site regularly, seeing if my scammers pop up again. I've been to Nigeria. At least at the end of the day I know I am not living in that slimepit. And that is a win.

Take care and stay safe!

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sun Feb 10, 2013 10:48 am
by Pinky
Awesome! Be sure and add the names, email addresses and pictures here, when you find them. And pass the word around to other singles. Knowledge is power.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 11:30 am
by jim_butterfield
After reading this thread I didn't realize how many women victims there are. I am mostly familiar with Russian scams which are mostly perpetrated upon men.

And most of the scams perpetrated on women are coming out of Africa. I think the media should do a better job in covering some of these scam stories so the public could be better educated. Also money transfer services such as Western Union and MoneyGram should do a better job in warning people not to send money to people you've met through the internet. I suspect they don't do it because they have their gravy train of collecting transfer fees.

One thing I've noticed is before sending money the victim keeps it to themselves. If they had consulted with a family member I am sure they would have warned that it's a scam. In fact about 10 years ago my own brother wanted me to help him get a cash advance on his credit card so he could send it to his internet girl friend in Africa. Fortunately I was able to explain to him it was a scam and stop him from doing so.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 2:32 pm
by Pinky
Wise words, Jim. I too wish that there were more education and awareness raised. It is happening, but slowly. Your brother was fortunate that he went to you for an objective opinion, someone whose eyes were not clouded over with the deception. Unfortunately, one of the main tactics the scammer uses is to alienate and isolate their victim from family and friends - when they have a victim that's even got solid real life relationships. It's why the love scam works so well for them though. Many people searching for love on the net are already isolated and lonely. Scammers love older women for this reason. Often they're widowed or divorced and their families and friendships have been fractured. Their older children are busy with their own lives and families and don't see themselves as needing to protect mom.

Yes, the money transfer companies could do so much more and they are improving, but victims could also be better warned by the dating and social networking companies. Some do warn their members but their warnings are merely vague innuendos, not sufficient to deter someone desperate for love. Scammers can also be thwarted in the early stages as well - and I see almost noting being done on that level. Scammers are very easy to spot for those of us who've learned to recognize them. All dating and social sites could do the same if they chose to. Instead they choose to ignore because scam profiles are like free product inventory for them to attract customers. It's all about the money. When victims finally start making these sites financially accountable - then things will change.

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sat Sep 28, 2013 12:05 am
by wowedandgot
I am trying very hard to not think of this man but I did fall for him I even cry for him...and may I say I am in no way a weak woman but he became such a habit and I really wanted this man I was attracted to him. and yes i sent money and a phone that doesn't hurt like my heart that was honest and true and someone stole that from me..I don't know how to stop thinking about him...I want to I just don't know how

Re: No one here is stupid!

Posted: Sat Sep 28, 2013 3:55 am
by Pinky
Give it time. And maybe if you read through the thread Scammers 4 Real and saw the faces of the real men like the one who faked love for you, your attachment might be diminished a bit.