God, I believed she was real written 24th December 2008
Before I tell my story know this information. Her name is Raji Opeyemi or Rita James. You will understand why the two names once you have read my story. She used this phone numbers to contact me +2348060848406 She also uses dating sites and yahoo. I just needed to get the warning out first.
It all started with a vary shy and timid first contact message sent to me at true.com. You see I got tired of the bar's and club's and started to try inter net dating for a change, and I had only been at it for three or four months before I got this message. She said she was new at inter net dating and that she came across my profile and it was the first one she wanted to write to.
She said I was her first contact, that she was shy and unsure about the whole thing. And she mentioned some anxiety about if I would get the message and if I would write back. That she knew she would be constantly checking her page for a return message.
As for me I always respond to a message sent to me, even if it is just to say sorry you live to far or sorry not interested. I think it is just the right thing to do. Plus I understood her anxiety, I felt it myself in the beginning. So I checked out her profile to learn more about her before I replied. It said she was from De. a bit of a stretch from Oh. but she said she would be willing to relocate if she met the right person.(About a month latter I tried to look up this profile and it had been deleted.)(Flag)
So I wrote her back and said I would like to get to know her better. She wrote back and asked if I could date someone who lived as far as she did. I told her De. is a distance but not off the planet. She told me she did not live there but lived in Nigeria. ( Flag)
I asked why her profile said De. she said a friend had helped her set up that profile. I asked why and she said she did not like the men there and wanted to start a new life here and to start a family God willing.
I told her I was will to get to know her better and we will see how it goes from there. And it went on like that for awhile and some how along the way she managed to get under my skin. We were emailing directly at yahoo and chatting there at this point.
Then she made a hard push about wanting to come here and be with me and starting telling me about the fees and what they were for and how I could help her come here to me.(Flag) It took me a moment to get her to slow down. I said I know the rest of the world thinks Americans are well to do but in fact most of us live pay check to pay check. That it would take me time to save up for the kind of help she was talking about. But we should look at this as a good thing. With the time need to save we could use it to get to know each other better.
At this point she did not want me to call her Raji Opeyemi any more that she had taken an American name to go with the new life she wanted to start here. From this point on she was Rita James.
All this time my guards were still up until I was contacted ( I thought at the time ) by the US embassy there in Nigeria about Rita's visa request and they need conformation as to her destination. When that happened I began to believe all of this was real. (Latter when I tried this embassy contact to find out more about this BTA form I would get a message error two days latter saying that the server took to long to respond.)
She tried calling me but most of the time the connection was bad. My cell service didn't include over seas and every time she called my bill got hit with a connection fee. I told her for us to really know each other that we would have to write our selves down with an open mind and a open heart. And we were, so I thought, now I realize she was just working me and she did a good job of it. She some how touched places in my heart I never knew was there and I fell in love with her. So much in love that I asked her to marry me. She knew the hook was sent deep at that point.
Here's the sad part, It was my choice. I needed her here in my life so I asked her to tell me every thing she needed right down to the last detail, and exactly how much all this would cost. She asked why and I told her I can get you here sooner but that it would be a race against time. That I could put off as many bills that I could for no longer than two months, after that things get nasty. I told her two months was make or break time.
Just one week into this she tells me her father has sold his shop where she worked and was retiring to South Africa. Since she is coming here she would stay where she was, but now needed my support for living expenses. After that there always seemed to be one thing after another. I was putting in extra hours to make up for the problems that kept coming up. And I was running on maybe four hours sleep a night if I was lucky.
Our chats that were starting around 1am had slowly shifted to starting at 3:30 to 4am. The stress from all of this was building to a breaking point, and I was having trouble thinking straight and told Rita this.
Looking back at it, being at peak stress levels was exactly where she wanted me, to keep me in panic mode. We got her visa (so I thought) and as for air fare her travel agent's $1,440.00 price was better then anything I could find on line at $1,600.00. So I sent her payments for the plane ticket.
I can't believe I did this, there were times I was sending nearly my whole pay check to her keeping just enough for fuel and mac & cheese that was all I was eating at the time. Please remember I thought I was doing all of this for my future wife.
The two months stretched into ten weeks. And when I sent the last payment she needed for her ticket home I told here there can't be another problem, you have to get on that plane, my well is dry and I got bill collectors on my back. She said no more problems baby I'm coming home to you love.
I went to work that day on such a high. I thought I did it, we did it. My love is coming home. After work I opened my email looking for her travel arrangements but instead she forwarded me a from she was given at the airport. It was a BTA(Basic Travel Allowance) form that stated to keep Nigerian citizens from becoming destitute they had to show they were carrying funds in order to board their flight. It was a vary official looking form, had all the right crests and seals but the wording and grammar didn't look right. At the bottom was a list of different types of visa's and dollar amounts needed. Next to her type of visa,a marriage visa was the amount she had to show $4,500.00 (I only have to show these funds, it's not a fee. You will get it all back when I land at the airport baby.)
I was crushed by this news. The well was dry and with western union fees included It took me ten weeks to send (your going to love this) a grand total of $5,421.20
As much as I loved her this BTA thing had all the feel of a final sting. No where in the world does an air line demand you carry large amounts of cash, they do just the opposite and tell you to use travelers checks. I needed to know more about this BTA and if it could be waved some how. So I called the Nigerian embassy here in D.C.(My visa contact didn't seem to exist any more.) and was told that this was a scam and that I should cut all contact.
I was done sending any more money to her. She had told me when she got here that she would find a job ASAP to help me dig myself out of the hole I made for myself to bring her home. And I had been telling her for weeks that she should look for work there just in case she would have to support herself. But she kept telling there were no good jobs there for her. I said I don't care if it's a bad job you need to get a job and NOW!
Four days go by and no word, then I get a call from a doctor who said Rita was in his care. That she has no one there and they found me listed as husband in her cell phone. And how I would pay for the care she was getting. And get this she was sick from taking the wrong type of birth control pill. I had asked her if she would start them and we would start a family after most of the dust settled.(She was to have been here almost a month ago now, per the plan we had set.)
This was to much. I told this doctor(Doctor Roy Dean) to email me in detail her vitals, medications and the douse being given to her, and the name of the hospital. My best friend is an RN and would know if this was BS or not. What he sent me was so vague and misspelled I didn't even have to bother my friend. And I did a search for the name of the hospital. The only one in the world by that name is in London England. But there was one last thing I needed to know.
I had been asking Rita for weeks that it would ease my worries if I could see something to show for all the hard work. I had asked her to scan her plane ticket (which she told me was always with her in her hand bag) and to scan her open passport so I could see it. She had told me the cafe didn't have a scanner so I told the doctor to this. He asked why and I told him point blank that unless I see prof I would not send a single cent. It took him 40 minutes to send it, and when he did he was so nice to take his lap top to Rita's room so she could chat with me.
Before I would say one word to her I took a close look at the passport (but the ticket was not with her)
The photo in the passport was a cut out of a photo she had already sent me. I blew up the details and it was a British passport issued one month earlier then the one I payed for.
I asked her why it was a British passport and she said that was where she was born. She had never mentioned that before. She had said her father was from the UK and her now decease mother was from Spain, but this was another first but all that didn't matter any more. The passport was what finally convinced my heart to listen to my brain.
Since when does the American embassy issue a British passport to a Nigerian citizen. Then it hit me, The US embassy in Nigeria is there to render aid to American citizens. They don't issue passports to locals.
That was almost three weeks ago. They have tried to call me twice, and the doctor has tried to reach me at yahoo. A few times I see an off line message, and there was one email telling me the chief doctor had questions for me. The calls go unanswered, the emails go without any reply. I know the truth now, in my heart as well as my head.
This is what I believe now. There is someone using the name Raji Opeyemi in Nigeria picking up the money I sent through western union. They keep a small fee for them selves then send the rest to Rita in jolly old England where I believe she really lives.(At the end of the doctors email address was co/uk)
The money I know is gone, it will take some time but I will recover from that. My heart is another story. I know she was a lie, nothing more than smoke and mirrors but my feeling for her were real. There is a hole in the center of my chest that just wont go away.
God I wish I had found this site sooner, but now that I have I really need the help and support here.
I have read many post's and have posted replies to stories that mirrored my own. But now it is my turn to tell it all. I know this got a little long winded I just had so much to get off my chest. And if you have read this to the end I thank you for you time.
Here is the craziest part of my story. I know I was scamed, but I'm still in love with her. I wish I could just turn it off but I can't. I wake up feeling empty inside without her, and no matter how I try I can't get rid of this hole I feel in my heart.
My friends are understanding, but they don't understand, not like others do here.
I need this group, you are the only ones who truly know what I'm going through. And I have no where else to turn.
This may sound lame but if you can please help. Wingman182
Wingman182 Pay It Forward